Meditation: It’s Not What You Think! HINT: It’s WAY easier!
Every time I go to teach meditation inevitably someone tells me that they cannot meditate because, “it’s impossible to clear my head!” Great news! That isn’t what meditation is! Yay! So you CAN do it, and today I am going to show you how…today we have a special message from previous retreat attendees giving testimonials from my mountain retreat! I would love to have you…come and meditate with me!
In this episode we will learn:
~ what exactly meditation is and how to do it.
~ how to meditate with mantra
~ A meditation experience using mantra meditation as an example to practice of focusing on only one this with the musical stylings courtesy of The Sonic Yogi
Meditation Music by Sonic Yogi
Deep Sleep With Singing Bowls
Pythagorean Dream
Listen to Sonic Yogi on: Spotify Apple Music Amazon Music Watch Sonic Yogi’s Ted Talk
Interesting Mentions:
Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind by Shunryu Suzuki
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Heartwood Retreat Center : location for Cheri’s Georgia Mountain Retreats
Jekyll Island: Location for Cheri’s seaside retreat
The Host for this podcast: Cheri Augustine Flake, LCSW The Stress Therapist and Author
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[00:00] Hey, beautiful people. What’s up? So I go around and teach everybody how to meditate. Kids, high schoolers, adults, seniors, men, women, tall, short, every color, every brand, every type, every kind of person. And almost every single group a person says, I can’t meditate because I can’t clear my mind. And here’s the good news. That’s not what meditation is. No way. I’m going to teach you today exactly what it is. So you can actually do it. Yes, because you don’t get these lovely benefits unless you actually do it. And then we’re going to do it together. So relax and settle in and listen up because your stress therapy session is about to begin right now.
[00:57] Hey, you beautiful people, it’s time for some stress therapy. A podcast about how to meditate and get better at stress for people living.
[01:04] In the real world.
[01:05] Finally, a place to park. My 25 plus years of experience of working as a psychotherapist in the mental health field. And now your host, me, the stress therapist, Sherry Flake.
[01:26] One of the best experiences I’ve ever had. The way she facilitated, the way she held a space. And I tell the truth when I need to tell the truth. She was magical. Yeah. Amazing experience. And I know leaving this retreat. I’ve been to so many meditation retreats. This is different because it’s accessible. I can start with five minutes and build from there. The place is magical. The music, the food, the art, the walks to the place. I mean, have no expectations, but yet, no, it’s amazing.
[01:56] I so love Sherry’s meditation retreats. I’ve actually been on a number of them. And it is because I do these retreats that meditation is something that I do like, it’s something I look forward.
[02:09] To that feels so good.
[02:12] I just feel like it’s just made my life so much better. So thank you, Sherry.
[02:16] Sherry is a seemingly limitless source of energy, wisdom, joy and love. She just is that and does that, like all the time.
[02:25] It’s been a lovely three days. I’ve met amazing women, like minded women. If you’re in any doubt whether to take a retreat or not, don’t be your message just to take it. Yoga, meditation, a lot of downtime, good food, and just getting to know like minded women like yourself, you deserve it.
[02:48] Okay, before we get into the thick of it, we’re going to take a teensy tiny break. Be right back. Hey, lovely, beautiful souls. What’s going on? So we’ve been talking about what meditation is, what meditation isn’t, how to do it, what we do. We’re getting back to the basics. It’s important that we remember that we have a beginner’s mind. If you want to check that book out, it’s Zen mind, beginner’s mind by Suzuki. That’s probably like the first spiritual book I ever read, and I was just totally won over, man, my eyes were wide open. I couldn’t believe that the translation was so simple, that the practice was so simple. Because meditation seems hard, right? It seems so hard. And every time I go somewhere to teach it, there’s always someone who says, listen, I can’t do it. Now, side note, if you’re walking around saying you can’t do something, you’re probably right. You’re going to be right. You’re creating that. Okay, so that’s true. If you say you can’t do it, then you can’t. However, I think the reason why people say that is because they’re not really sure what meditation is exactly. Now, I’m not going to get into the yoga sutras. I’m not going to get into ashtanga, the eight limbs of yoga. I’m not going to complicate things, but just so you know, those little poses that you do in yoga classes, that’s only one limb of eight that pertain to yoga and being a yogi and what that means, or a yogini. I don’t want to complicate things, but I want you to know that four of those limbs have to do with a practice of concentration, quiet, peace, going inward, meditation, whatever you want to call it. Okay? So it is a very important part of being self realized, being actualized, waking up, being a yoghini, and finding that perfect holy spirit part inside of you and getting closer to God and that little piece of you, that is God, regardless of what God means to you. So we have to pay attention to it. And like I say all the time, the benefits of meditation are astounding. It’s about as good for you as water people. It’s really important that you’re doing it. You need to think of it like brushing your chomps, man. It’s not biological. You can get by without doing it, but it’s going to be a rough life and very uncomfortable visits to the dentist if you don’t take care of your teeth. Okay, so this is like taking care of your brain. This is like taking care of your soul. It’s like little soul hot tub visits. We just got a hot tub like a year ago. And, you know, I thought it was going to make my life better. And I thought it was going to make my life more relaxing and more fun and healthier because there’s all these health benefits to having a hot tub. But I got to tell you, it’s a total life changer. It’s amazing. My family communes in there. We talk more, we hang out there. It’s lovely, and it’s divine. I’m a big fan of a hot tub. Find yourself a hot tub. However, meditation isn’t even that complicated. You don’t even need anything in order to do it. You need your beautiful self. And like we learned last week, you just need your beautiful breath, right? If you want to know how to do it. So when people say, what is meditation? Or the reason why I can’t do it, they usually say, because I can’t clear my head. Because I can’t clear my head. That’s why I can’t meditate. And I have excellent news. That’s not what meditation is. It’s not clearing your head of all thoughts. In fact, if you can do that, let me know, call me up and teach me how all the monks would want to know, too, because that is not what meditation is. Okay. Meditation, for purposes of exactly what we’re doing and getting all of these juicy benefits and not diving in too deep, a good way to think about meditation. Instead of using the m word, go ahead and use the c. The c word. Hang with me. Hang on. The c word is concentration. Okay? So meditation is not focusing on nothing. No thing, zero things. It’s focusing on one thing. So not no thing. Not nothing. One thing. And what is that one thing? Well, last week, we went over, we used breath. It doesn’t matter what the one thing is, but you have to have that one thing. In the buddhist tradition, this is often called the anchor. It’s the thing that you throw over the side of the boat that keeps you steady, keeps you coming back and back and back to that one place without floating off into the abyss of thoughts and having monkey mind, which is not a crazy mind, but it’s a mind that goes from one limb to the next limb to the next limb, like a monkey travels across the jungle. Okay. You don’t want that. You want to stay focused on one thing. It’s just one thing. And when we’ve talked about your brain, and I’m going to get into this next time, but, you know, you have those little threads that come down from your beautiful human prefrontal cortex. We’re lucky enough to have them now that we’re humans and those little threads that calm your downstairs brain. The part of your brain that gets all riled up, that’s upset, that’s nervous, that’s scared, that’s depressed, that’s anxious, that’s worried, that’s impulsive, that’s flipping your lid. Acting like an animal, right? Your prefrontal cortex is in charge of keeping you acting like a human. And I’m going to give you a really good way to conceptualize this next time. But for now, just know that every single time that you space out and you come back to that one thing, whatever it is, a mantra, a word, a breath, a sound, I’m going to keep it real simple. Every time you come back to it, those threads are strengthened. And you don’t have to do anything to calm yourself. It’s automatically done with these little beautiful threads that come down from your prefrontal cortex and calm your lovely downstairs brain. So you act like a human with compassion and empathy and peace and calm, rather than a zebra where someone’s just took her young away or something like that. Okay? So you don’t flip your lid. You don’t act like a nut. You keep it together, you are able to pause and then respond. And that one thing, that one thing is the ticket to strengthening those beautiful threads, to calming yourself and opening a door to benefits of meditation that no one could ever predict for you. Because it is different for every human, it’s most of the fun to figure out what meditation is going to do for you. So when someone says, I can’t meditate, I can’t clear my head, what are you going to say? You’re going to say, that’s not what it is, man. It’s learning how to concentrate on one thing. I mean, it’s interesting, because I send my kids to school, I tell them to concentrate, to focus, whatever. No one teaches them how to do that. Now, did anyone teach me that? I’m Gen X. Yeah, I’m Gen X. No one taught me that. However, I did not have a little device that I carried around with me all day every day that taught me how to be distracted. Right? And so we’re practicing being distracted all day long with all of these devices and notifications, and right now, I’m being distracted by my puppy, who’s. I don’t know what she’s chewing on, but we’re not practicing being focused, right? And this is the antithesis of that. Meditation is the opposite of that. It is the cure for inattentiveness. It is the cure for being subject to distraction. It is the cure. Okay. All you have to do is practice. And we don’t teach our kids how to practice, how to focus or anything like that, because I was a gen xer. And I will tell you that most of my childhood, I was bored out of my mind, okay? I was staring out of a window, but I would start to. What? Daydream? Yeah, about what? Usually one thing and space out and think about and visualize and imagine. And our kids aren’t doing that right now. They’re never bored. That’s why whenever my kids are bored, I’m like, oh, yeah, that’s so exciting. They hate that, of course, because being bored is boring. However, when your brain is idle like that, it is so good for your brain, and we’re not getting that anymore. So we must create it by focusing on one thing. And today we’re going to do it with mantra. We’re going to take a little break. We’ll come back, I’ll give you a mantra. That’s going to be your one thing, baby. You got this. And I’ll be with you the whole way.
[11:34] In light of the idea that meditation is focusing on one thing, we are going to use mantra, a mind tool that gives your brain a little something to do while your beautiful, holy, and creative and divine self finds this peace, finds this calm without you having to do anything but focus on this one little mantra. It is the hymn of the universe. It is the sound that the earth would be making if you could hear it breathing.
[12:24] It is the word of God.
[12:25] It is the only word. It is the beautiful song that the earth is singing to us.
[12:35] Ohm. Ohm.
[12:39] The simplest mantra.
[12:41] I’m leaving you with it.
[12:42] That is the one thing, so you remain really still. You can close your beautiful eyes. You focus on one thing.
[12:54] Ohm.
[12:56] And when it moves away from your awareness, you just bring it right back. You keep coming back to it. Keep coming back to it. Gently bring yourself back to ohm. Time and time again. That is the practice.
[13:13] Ohm. Ohm.
[13:18] I’ll be back to guide you out.
[19:40] Ohm. Ohm.
[19:45] You can allow the mantra to fall away from your awareness. But before you just jump up and move on, just sit a little while longer in this beautiful space that you have created with concentration. Take a long, slow, deep breath in.
[20:11] Your nose.
[20:14] Letting it all go out of your mouth. And one more long, slow, deep breath in your nose. Awakening, coming to this space, this time, this moment, letting it all go out of your mouth. And when you’re ready, you can open your beautiful eyes.
[20:50] It. Okay, so that’s it. It might seem a little boring. That’s okay. It might seem a little simple, but that’s okay. And the wise words of my bass player from 13 stories, little pop band that used to run around Atlanta. It doesn’t need to be a math problem to be genius. The Beatles, they had four tracks. Those songs are pretty good. Don’t complicate things. No escomplicado. Okay, you got this. And if someone asks you or tells you that they can’t meditate because they think it’s clear in their head or whatever, you don’t even need to correct them. You don’t even need to tell anyone you’re meditating. You don’t have to explain it. It can be private. You don’t have to share all your stuff on the social media. You know what I’m saying? You can keep it to your beautiful self. It can be your own private little secreto. I’ve been speaking a lot of Spanish here lately because I have these beautiful family working on my house. Oh, my gosh. I have the best contractors in the world. If you need something done and you’re in the Atlanta area, please let me know. I can’t even believe I’m saying this, because I didn’t know that you could like your contractors. I didn’t know that they could be anything but frustrating. But these guys are so kind. They do an amazing job. They’re unbelievably reasonably priced, and they’re just so awesome. And they are from Venezuela, so it’s really easy to root from them now, because we know the turmoil that’s going on there. We can send those families love and light. So I’ve had an opportunity to speak a little bit more Spanish, and my Spanish is getting really good. Anyway, let me know if you feel compelled to tell someone what meditation is. Let me know if you would like me to do it. If you’re in the Atlanta area, I’m happy to come to your school, to your work. If it’s for a school, it’s completely gratis, totally free. I will come out and speak to your kids and teach them how to meditate. My mission is to teach as many people how to meditate in the world, because it’s just so good for you. It’s about as good for you as water, remember? And I am happy to explain that it’s not clearing your head and that it’s relatively simple and you can do it every single day, just like brushing your teeth. And you can feel like a million bucks more than you’re already feeling. And you can take away some of the symptoms of physiological problems, psychological problems, feeling more calm, feeling less distracted, feeling more focused. People who meditate, they enjoy music more. I mean, come on, who doesn’t want that? They have a decreased need for sleep. They’re less likely to come down with Alzheimer’s. It helps your immunity. I mean, it goes on and on and on. And I want you to have it. So reach out for me if I can be of help in any way, and come on a retreat with me. I got one coming up in May. You’ll walk away with a daily habitual habit from this retreat. I have some really cool special guests. The sonic yogi, the guy we’re listening to on all these meditations, he’s going to be there. The food alone is spectacular. It has an ayurvedic flair. And I will be there teaching you meditation. We’ll also do yoga together in the beautiful blue ridge mountains. Come with me. I would love, love, love for you to be there. So until next time, have a lovely, lovely day.
[24:02] How y’all feeling after that stress therapy session? Good. Awesome. Check out the show notes to connect with me, the stress therapist on social media, at the stresstherapist on Instagram, and at stresstherapy on Twitter. You can always go to ilovetherapy.com to find out about meditation and yoga retreats.
[24:20] And other offerings that I have there.
[24:22] If you live in Georgia and you’re.
[24:23] Ready to be one of my clients.
[24:25] Go to my website to find out.
[24:26] How you can sign up for a.
[24:27] Free face to face consultation with me. At the very least, jump on my mailer so you don’t stress or miss one thing thing. Until next time, have a lovely, lovely day.
