Hey beautiful people!
I’m a midwestern girl so when I moved to Atlanta, I was delighted to see how so very kind everyone is here!
Being a people pleaser and putting everybody ahead of you is quite nice but…is it ever at the expense of…You?
If you’re keeping commitments to others while ignoring or compromising commitments to yourself, you might have what I call, Southern Hospitality Syndrome. After a while, it will begin to affect your self-care, self-esteem and self-worth and may leave you hopeless to change or downright depressed.
Let’s say that you and I were scheduled for a lunch date and I couldn’t make it. What would I do? Call you up and reschedule, of course!
What if I did nothing at all?? Let’s say that I never called, never acknowledged it…just blew off the whole thing, what would I be? Unreliable? What if I did it more than once? Then, what would I be? A flake (not a lovely Flake, like me!:)? What if I did it all the time? Well, I’d be a jerk, of course!
Now, ask yourself…how do you treat the commitments you’ve made to yourself? With the same respect as you do with commitments to others???
If not, and if you are constantly letting your internal commitments slide, that’s a problem far bigger than just a missed commitment. You might be creating a self-image problem.
Article continues here….thanks for reading….
Your brain doesn’t know the difference between a broken commitment with yourself or with someone else.
So, if you keep telling yourself that you are going to clean the garage, organize the office, cut the grass or even write that book and you don’t do it, your brain starts to think (and therefore, have you believing) that you are an unreliable jerk that doesn’t stick to your commitments.
Yikes!
And you need to know that if you think something over and over, anything at all, you will eventually believe it.
That’s all beliefs are…just thoughts that you’ve had over and over! You may actually have yourself believing lots of things that just simply aren’t true…that you can’t finish anything, won’t start anything or that you don’t stick your guns about positive change in your life.
This is dangerous because if you believe something, anything…your brain will work overtime to perpetuate it…to make it so,
even if it’s not true!
See how this can smash your new ideas, stunt your growth at work and keep you from accomplishing your dreams? You don’t need it! This means that you have to take some action today and get those beliefs turned around!
Change your thoughts! Trash those false beliefs!
The next time the vacuum breaks, or you skip the volunteer job, or you blow off your yoga class, go ahead and give yourself a nice dose of Southern Hospitality!
Treat yourself as you would if it were me, your buddy, your neighbor, or anyone else that was meeting you on your living floor to fix the vacuum. Picture your neighbor waiting at the homeless shelter for you to help out. See your best friend honking the horn for you in your driveway on the way to the yoga studio and stop being a jerk to yourself!
Do yourself the best favor ever and start by just doing it! Keep your promise to yourself and get it done! This means that you will have to be a very careful scheduler.
I mean, do you make dinner plans with someone knowing that you will be canceling? No! You are careful when you make the date that nothing will get in the way.
If you really can’t follow through and something really has come up, simply “call” yourself up and make a new, realistic plan; just like you would if it were anyone else.
Use a calendar and “reschedule” yourself. Treat yourself just as you treat others. Know that you will get to it, mark a specific time and date for it and be true to yourself.
Soon you’ll have your brain believing that you’re the BEST!
You’ll be doing all that “needs to be done,” “should be done” and what you “really want in life.”
You’ll believe that you’re the reliable one who always gets it done and you’ll be perpetuating that belief by thinking it over and over.
With Metta,
Cheri
Want more? Click here to listen to Cheri’s podcast covering Southern Hospitality Syndrome. Cheri just returned from Podfest Multimedia Expo! It was a great experience!
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The Stress Therapist turned 16!! Sweet! Here’s a throwback for you!
And here’s Cheri today! Looking good!
